All About Grace

St. Nicholas, the Kleeschen, Santa Claus, and Jesus Christ

2010-12-29T16:06:00.000-08:00

I believed in Santa Claus until I was five. It was exciting and magical! I wrote to him about being a good girl and told him the gifts I wanted to get from him on Christmas Day. Out of a long list of toys and dolls, I would get at least one.

I discovered that Santa wasn't real when we moved to the Philippines when I was five years old. There was no snow. The climate was too warm for Santa to go sleighing from one house to another. There were no reindeers. There were no chimneys. I wrote my wish list to Santa but I got candies and chocolates sold from my Lola's sari-sari store found in front of their house.

We no longer had the tradition of writing to Santa after that. A few years later, I'd just see him in Hollywood movies, shopping malls and Christmas decors. After all, I learned that Jesus was the real hero of Christmas. Of all the gifts we can ever receive, the one He gave was the most precious of all. This is something my husband and I taught our son,Polo.

Now, living in Luxembourg, we are introduced to another gift-giving personality -- St. Nicholas. History says that Santa Claus started as St. Nicholas. But not all acknowledge Santa Claus here. For locals, it is St. Nicholas, whom they call the Kleeschen, who checks if children are naughty or nice and gives them their most desired gift together with some chocolates, fruits and nuts on December 6 every year. The Kleeschen is not only a role acted out by the parents for their children but also by the god parents, friends,and family.

Preparing gifts for the children, lining up to get a gift from St. Nicholas in the malls, and everything that comes with it was all fun for Polo. But as Christmas approached, I wasn't sure if we should introduce the Santa and Kleeschen traditions to our sons.

We live in a country that believes in the Kleeschen; have family who live in the U.S., where there is a Santa Claus; and grew up in a country where it was too hot for the Kleeschen and Santa. We decided that as long as our son knows that we celebrate Christmas because of Jesus Christ, then, we're good. :)

Breaking Ground

2010-10-23T19:17:00.000-07:00

The novelty of being a resident here is slowly fading away. The awe and disbelief I felt before is gradually being replaced by reality. I am not a tourist. I reside here now. I can still put on my tourist hat but not with a traveller's urgency. I guess, this is a tinny-tiny taste of what settling down is.

It's time to start breaking ground and grounding myself and my family in the new country we call home. The soil is fertile, we must let our roots grow and dig in. For how long will we be here? Who knows? Still, it's time to lower the anchor and let the heart of this country touch ours.

Luxembourg, give it to me, baby!

Unhurried

2010-10-21T15:06:00.000-07:00

Here I am again, forced to an unhurried pace to fulfill one of the greatest duties of my lifetime – mother, nurturer. What better way is there to care for one’s child? What greater gift can there be than the one bestowed unto me by nature, by the Heavens Above? Because of faithfulness and compassion I have received and so with love, faith and dedication, I give. The wealth of health and well-being are the rewards I reap in the sight of a contented grin reflecting security and trust. This is priceless because at this moment, all else stands still, all priorities pause. While a private silent conversation takes place, a secret exchange, a slow dance that cannot be savored at a hurried pace.

Beloved Victor of Christ and of the People

2010-10-20T21:13:00.000-07:00

To both Marvin and I, this is the meaning of our second son's name -- Juan Nicolo Amiel.

Juan - the spanish version of John, which means a gift of God. It is also the name of one of Jesus' 12 apostles, whom He called beloved.

Nicolo - is a variant of the Greek name Nicholas and means "people of victory."

Amiel - is a hebrew name meaning "God of my people."

He was born 2.78Kg, 48.5cm via c-section at 1:23 am in Kirchberg Hospital, Luxembourg. Now, he is 3 months and 8 days young, weighing at least 5.140 Kg. He smiles, laughs, and sleeps longer at night. He seems to see most things. He still cries like a baby girl when we delay in addressing his needs. He's been to Germany once, Belgium twice, rode a chairlift and much more while snuggling in my Storchenwiege Baby Wrap. Thank God, he is breastfeeding steadily.

He is the new addition to our little Mara-Agustin family. :) He is making our everyday life here in Luxembourg very interesting.

With Tons of Grace, Life Goes on 17 Hours Away...

2010-09-13T20:13:00.000-07:00

My husband, two sons and I have been in Luxembourg for at least 5 months now. It took us around 8 months to get our act together and relocate here then, we hopped on 3 planes that took a total of 17 hours to bring us here.

We've been through tons already -- lived in hotel, a service apartment, now settled in our own aparment (or condo space as it is called in the Philippines); learned to take care of our firstborn on our own, manage our own household, grappled with our home appliances (as we sometimes still do); adjusted to the language (and we still are) and developed our french, german, and luxembourgish basic vocabulary; played host to our first house guest; entertained house guests a couple of times; introduced our firstborn to the Creche' (daycare), dragged him there crying then brought him there with ease and excitement after he got used to it and enjoyed the company of his friends and "teachers"; welcomed our second child, panicked a bit about the new addition to our family (mainly, that's just me. My hormonal changes are the culprit), established a new household rhythm; welcomed my Mom to our house, introduced her to our second child, and got her acquainted with Luxembourg and neighboring Germany and Belgium cities. Whew, I hardly could say that in one breath let alone write it in just one sentence!

Living in a foreign country on our own can be challenging but manageable. I feel the need to stretch my boundaries and expand my comfort zone. Most of the time, slowly, I adapt. I don't do it with ease, though. Usually, it comes with a lot of anxiety and uncertainty but then, grace comes at the right time to pull me forward.

Like when our firstborn begged and cried when we brought him to the Creche' the first few times, I was uncertain if we were doing the right thing or just traumatizing him. With patience and LOTS of prayers, he eventually agreed to go there two times a week for a few hours and eventually enjoyed it. He even asked me to let him stay there longer a number of times and would sing and jump around on our way home from the Creche' -- signs that he was having fun there.

An awkward "stretch" was when I had our second son. I always felt that I was measured and have been found lacking -- with my mother milk supply during the 1st few weeks after giving birth; with my capacity to manage the house with a new baby and take care of our firstborn at the same time. It's really all about grace. It comes when I need it the most and then it gently leads me on, bringing me one step higher in the ladder of motherhood and housewife-dom.

I am an artist

2009-05-17T18:20:00.000-07:00

I am an artist. I am meant to create art. Artistry is in my blood, in my family line.

When my Lolo Andy was alive, he would stay in his room and type away what I thought were legal documents for the cases he was working on. On the night of his funeral, I learned that he wasn’t slaving on legal documents one-hundred percent of the time but was composing poetry, essays and stories most of the time.

His written art were all about family, virtues, integrity – things that his heart was full of. I could sense his struggle to be a light in a very dark and gloomy world. I could taste the pain he felt when trying to cope with the death of our Lola. I could even feel the warm embrace of love he had for his loved ones. His literature was so alive and real.

While drinking from his cup of words, I felt my soul trace its roots back to him. Part of my identity was revealed. I am part of a song that my grandfather composed in his most authentic moments. Now, my dad, titas, sisters and cousins are joining in, contributing to the harmony.

Lolo Andy and most definitely our forefathers who came before him were artists who painted our lives with color, emotion, sincerity, and passion. This is the reason why the call of the pen keeps wakes me up in the wee hours of the morning and the call of art and color tugs at my heart during unforgettable soul-binding moments.

To my lineage, I must be true. To my gifts, I must be grateful. To myself, I must be permissive. I must let my art live. Awake my soul. Rise my senses. Give glory to the Source of all Good Things. The gift of time, we will not waste.

Color-coordinated

2009-05-17T17:51:00.000-07:00

Unlike most females, I am amused whenever my wardrobe matches someone I know. I am thrilled by the coincidental occurrence of two people wearing identical outfits while being in one place at one time. I don't expect my clothes to be unique and one-of-a-kind as my budget only allows me to shop in common stores that have more than 5 stocks of each size of one design... But, it's just funny to meet a clothes-twin.

Since, I'm sooo amused with uniformed outfits, my office friends and I planned a mellow yellow day... We were like sunshine in a gloomy, cloudy day. :)

Hmm... What's New?

2009-04-26T18:16:00.000-07:00

I haven't blogged for a long time now. I've been quite preoccupied. Thank God for the free time I have this morning. :) Here are the updates on Polo so far:

Polo turned 2 last Feb 21, 2009. We celebrated it at McDonald's in Frontera Verde on Feb 22 with friends and family.

I stopped breastfeeding Polo one week after he turned 2. This is an answered prayer. I prayed that the weaning will not be traumatic and stressful for the 2 of us. It wasn't automatic but it wasn't difficult either. Marvin was the one who pacified Polo and put him to bed during the weaning week. It helped that we prayed for it to be easy and that we've been talking to about the weaning Polo since he was 1.6yrs old. Yesterday, someone asked him if he wanted to drink milk from Mommy. Polo mumbled, "... (I am) 2 years old," explaining in his own words that he is old enough to drink from a cup. Awww... He's slowly growing out of his "baby" years. *Sniff*Sniff*

He didn't cry during his last haircut and Pedia Check-up! Wohoo! We can expect less stress for Marvin and I on our next visit to the barbershop and doctor. Wihee! Oh, and yesterday, all of us got our Flu Vaccine Shots at home c/o of my sister, Doctor Joanne. It was painless for most of us, btw. I am so proud of you, Ate! Marvin and I prepped Polo. One week in advance, we were telling him about the injection and that his Ninang Joanne would be giving it to all of us. Yesterday, before Doctor-Ninang Joanne arrived, we reminded him about the injection, saying, "Later, Ninang Joanne will give Polo an injection. Everybody will get an injection." Without much fuss or thought, Polo said his usually sweet and cool, "Ok." True enough when it was his turn to get his shot, he was cool -- his usual crying and whining was absent. He even watched his Lolo Dante, Ninang Kaye and Kuya Aia get their own shot before he did. He squirmed a bit when he felt the bite of the vaccine but there were no tears. After the shot, he limped a bit but headed back to our room to play with his toys. Brave boy, I must say! In my heart, I am jumping and cart-wheeling. Yipee! Mana siya kay Mommy. Hindi siya takot sa injection! ;)

He can finally drink from a straw. We tried to introduce a straw to him a number of times. Those attempts ended with him blowing through the straw than sipping from it. Hehehe... During the Holy Week, I was surprised to see him drink from it with ease. Now with the straw, drinking milk from the cup is more fun. It helps us get him to drink his milk.

He can sing! His all-time favorite songs are "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star", "Happy Birthday", "ABC" (which has the same tune as Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star... hehehe), and "Are You Sleeping, Brother John?" It's sooo cute to see him sing on his own when he plays. He just breaks into song or hums and sways to the tune of the song he is singing.

He is now old enough to join kiddie games in Children's parties. Last week, Polo and Marvin attended a children's party. Polo would usually run around, dance or cling to us but this time, he listened to the instructions, watched the other children, joined the games, and even won! Wohoo! Winner! :)

His cartoon movie favorites have expanded. Cars and Bee Movie is still the all-time favorite but now, he requests for "Robinsons" (for Meet the Robinsons, one of the cartoon movies that made me cry), "Lion King", and "Kung Fu Panda." He still complains when you change the channel while he is watching boxing, UFC, and circuit racing (F1, motorbikes, cars, etc). He knows his TV preference. In each cartoon show or movie that he watches, someone has to be "Papa" (or Marvin), "Mommy" (or me), and Polo.... So in "Ratatouille", I am the lady chef and Marvin is Linguini. In "Meet the Robinsons," Polo is Lewis, I am Lewis' Mom, and Marvin is Lewis' Dad. In "Cars", Polo is Lightning Mc Queen, and I am Sally... and so on and so forth. Hehehe...

He already had his 1st kiss! He probably kissed many girls before but this is the 1st one we captured on cam. Look, it looks like he will become a good kisser when he grows up. Hehehe...

Hope

2008-12-09T21:34:00.000-08:00

"He gives strength to the fainting; for the weak he makes vigor abound. Though young men faint and grow weary, and youths stagger and fall, They that hope in the LORD will renew their strength, they will soar as with eagles’ wings; They will run and not grow weary, walk and not grow faint." Isaiah 40

I hope so that I will grow strong. Hope seems to be the word of the day for me. I read a story this morning about an inexperienced person who used his inexperience to his advantage during a job interview. In job interviews, inexperience is the main reason why employers turn down applicants. But the applicant in the story turned it into a strength by saying that his lack of experience would mean that he'd rely on his out of the box thinking on how to do things. With this, he would be able to contribute fresh new creative ideas than those that are backed by experience. Good point. Nice new perspective don't you think?

Not to return to what was left behind

2008-11-13T19:26:00.000-08:00

Gospel Lk 17:26-37
Jesus said to his disciples:“As it was in the days of Noah, so it will be in the days of the Son of Man; they were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage up to the day that Noah entered the ark, and the flood came and destroyed them all. Similarly, as it was in the days of Lot: they were eating, drinking, buying, selling, planting, building; on the day when Lot left Sodom, fire and brimstone rained from the sky to destroy them all. So it will be on the day the Son of Man is revealed.On that day, someone who is on the housetop and whose belongings are in the house must not go down to get them, and likewise one in the field must not return to what was left behind. Remember the wife of Lot. Whoever seeks to preserve his life will lose it, but whoever loses it will save it. I tell you, on that night there will be two people in one bed; one will be taken, the other left. And there will be two women grinding meal together; one will be taken, the other left.” They said to him in reply, “Where, Lord?”He said to them, “Where the body is,there also the vultures will gather.”

On the day the Son of Man is revealed - He reveals to us Himself everyday. Sometimes, he makes special revelations and this can happen any day.

Someone who is on the housetop and whose belongings are in the house must not go down to get them, and likewise onei n the field must not return to what was left behind - When He calls, when He makes his little aparitions in our lives, we must let him capture us right where we are. We should be ready to pack up and go. No need to pick up the other pieces of our lives. Hello, the Omnipotent one is calling us! We shouldn't worry about what we leave behind. They should be considered as crumbs.

With a grain of salt...

2008-11-13T18:44:00.000-08:00

"Take it with a grain of salt."

That's how the saying goes. When someone says something against you, they say, take it with a grain of salt. Ever wonder what it means?

This is what I think it means. Sometimes, it's hard to swallow bad things that people will say about you, especially if you know that it's not true. What do we usually swallow? Food, right? What do we do when food tastes bad and is hard to take or swallow? We add seasoning to give it flavor. We add seasong to make it more appealing. Seasoning makes food taste better (and helps us chew them into tiny bits and pieces!). Therefore, if you take things with a grain of salt, you'll be able to take them as they are, see them in a better light, or to turn them into dust, negligible dust!

But don't you ever wonder why it's salt and not sugar or some other spice? All of them give flavor and all of them serve to preserve. Or maybe sugar: medicine? You know, as Mary Poppins says "just a spoonful of sugar makes the medicine go down... in the most delightful way!" Hmm...

Like a Frog

2008-11-13T18:27:00.000-08:00

A frog has no ears but it jumps, jumps, jumps! That's was an anecdote my friend told me when we talked about "neighborhood" politics. A frog has no ears so he doesn't listen to intrigues. Instead, he keeps on doing what he's good at -- jumping! Thus, by jumping, he covers the distance.

Once when I was confronted with a couple of regrets in life, someone reminded me that going down the road of regret is dangerous and unwise. Likewise, he gave me a good analogy: At work, when a team encounters a problem, what do we do? We usually check what went wrong then we set up measures to make sure that we avoid them in the future and improve the way things are done. We all agree that it's a useless and fruitless exercise to dwell on what went wrong and point fingers at whose fault it is, right?

The same goes for our past. If we detect some of our wrong choices when we look back at our past, there's no sense in dwelling on it. Doing so will only lead to regret. Lingering on regret will bring us no where. Instead, it will be better to acknowledge everything as it is and turn it into a learning experience -- a jump off point. Then, like a frog, jump, jump, jump!

Dance Time!

2008-11-12T22:02:00.000-08:00

My husband and I have been going to a fitness gym for about 1 month now. Yep, We're working out. We have to in order to retain my youthfulness (or whatever's left of it...) and to stay fit -- one of our goals for this year. :)

By monday next week, I'll have my 3rd orientation, where one of the trainers will design my own personal fitness program but so far, I've been attending gym classes. I've attended Streetdancing, Body Sculpt, Hatha Yoga, Belly Dancing, Precision Cycling and Capoeira. Of all of these, Streetdancinng, Hatha Yoga and Precision Cycling are my personal favorite.

I don't know if I'm excited about my personal training program but I definitely enjoy the streetdancing class (even if it's jam-packed with people everytime). It's fun and I love dancing!

Dancing is a joy me and my family share. In fact, even my son has catched the interest and the talent (but my son thinks that his Dad is the dance guru because he always sees his Dad dance in our bedroom... well, he has yet to discover the what real-dancing moves mean... hehehe). After the classes, I teach my younger sister the steps I learn and we dance it together.

My son would usually see me teaching my sister the dance moves. I would demo the steps in 8 counts ... 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 and my sister would follow. Soon, my son would try to dance himself or count with us, saying, "5, 6, 7, 8..." Charming, isn't it.

It seems that my solo was getting accustomed to the thought that his Mommy also dances! Now, whenever we ask him to dance, he will usually point us to the sala, where my sister and I usually have our mini dance classes. If we won't go to the sala with him, he would pull us by the hand and bring us to the sala and say, "Dance!" and "Watch!," which translates to: "Mommy and Daddy dance while I will watch."

In the sala, he would sit on his rounded rattan floor pillow, put his arms on the center table and wait for us to showcase our groove in sets of 8 counts. Hahaha! Yes, we have to admit that he's starting to become a charming little manipulative boy in a disarming way.

Akeelah and the Bee

2008-09-29T04:44:00.000-07:00

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond mesaure. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same."

Have you ever seen "Akeelah and the Bee"? HBO was featuring it 2 months ago. It's very inspiring. The quote above is what struck me the most.

Google-ing my Name

2008-09-29T04:35:00.000-07:00

An article in Reader's Digest said that once in a while, one should google his own name to see the information available to all about one's self... So, last night I googled my name and this is what I discovered -- namewiki:

The origin of my first name is Hebrew. It means God will add.

Here are the stats related to my Maiden Family Name:

It is the 10196th most common family name in the United States
It occurs 2902 times in the most recent US Census (2000)
1.08 out of every 100,000 people in the United States have it as a family name
77.39% are White
0% are Black
9.75% are Hispanic (any)
7.37% are Asian / Pacific Islander
0% are American Indian / Native American
2.69% are Two or More

Whoah! No wonder, we didn't know much of our kin. Most of them are white and are in the US. Hahaha! Hmm, why is my Dad's skin dark, then? Hahaha

Check out your family name in namewiki. Has it reached the US, yet?

It is about time!

2008-09-25T19:13:00.001-07:00

Eccl 3:1-11
"There is an appointed time for everything, and a time for every thing under the heavens. A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to uproot the plant. A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to tear down, and a time to build. A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance. A time to scatter stones, and a time to gather them; a time to embrace, and a time to be far from embraces. A time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away. A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to be silent, and a time to speak. A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

What advantage has the worker from his toil? I have considered the task that God has appointed for the sons of men to be busied about. He has made everything appropriate to its time,and has put the timeless into their hearts, without man’s ever discovering, from beginning to end, the work which God has done."

It's time for me to be born again with a new mission and vision. It's time for me to plant anew. It's time to kill negativism and time to heal my soul. It's time to tear down the walls in my life and to build bridges, meaningful relationships and wonderful memories. It's a time to laugh more than I cry unless I cry for joy, love and success. It's a time to dance because life is worth celebrating! It's a time to scatter stones and make them as cornerstones for different dimensions in my life -- Family, Career, Friendly Communities, Service and Adventure! It's a time to embrace life -- to gracefully respect the 30 years that collected and the 30 plus years that I will groove about. It's a time to seek my full potential and to lose my inhibitions. It's about time that I keep every my heart, body and soul healthy and cast away heartfelt wishes and prayers to guide me everyday. It's a time to rend everything that seems broken in me and a time to sew the mysteries of my years into one beautiful quilt that will keep me warm til the end of my days. It's a time to be verbally silent about my complaints in life and a time to speak more of what's good, true and noble. It's a time to love as much as a can and hate things that deem to destroy life, love, and meaning. It's time to wage war against things that destroy purity and innocence and a time for inner peace, sanity and spiritual security.

God has pressed upon the timeless in my heart. I'm silencing my intellect and my soul so that timeless and purpose will emerge.

Vanities, vanities !?!?!?!

2008-09-24T19:01:00.000-07:00

"Vanity of vanities, says Qoheleth,vanity of vanities! All things are vanity! What profit has man from all the labor which he toils at under the sun? One generation passes and another comes, but the world forever stays. The sun rises and the sun goes down; then it presses on to the place where it rises. Blowing now toward the south, then toward the north, the wind turns again and again, resuming its rounds. All rivers go to the sea, yet never does the sea become full. To the place where they go, the rivers keep on going. All speech is labored; there is nothing one can say. The eye is not satisfied with seeing nor is the ear satisfied with hearing. What has been, that will be; what has been done, that will be done. Nothing is new under the sun. Even the thing of which we say, “See, this is new!” has already existed in the ages that preceded us. There is no remembrance of the men of old; nor of those to come will there be any remembrance among those who come after them." Eccleciastes 1: 2-11

What's the sense of doing anything, then? What's the sense of working hard on anything? Wala na atang sense...

....

Or maybe, proverbs is teaching us to work on something that will be worth while. Wonder what that will be for me. I better find out and start working on it soon. I only have a few years left. I have to keep my thirty, flirty and thriving "motto" on a roll.

Think quick, my girl! Any suggestions?

First Aid Training Moments

2008-09-21T21:55:00.001-07:00

These are some of the pictures during our 1st training day.

Trainor: First Aiders, line up by height!

First Aiders: Yes, Sir!

One-Man Carry: Lover's Carry

(Disclaimer: We're not lovers)

Mukhang ang lakas ko, no?

2-Man Carry: Carry by Extremeties
(2 of the smallest/light-weight members of the class decided to make me their "victim" and carry me this way across the room during their practical exam. Naks, way to go!)

2-Man Carry: Forgot what this is called. Let's call it, Prinsesang nakaupo sa tasa carry in the mean time. Hehehe. I felt like a princess.

6-Man Carry or Snow White and the 6 dwarves carry hehehe.

(Yep, again, I'm playing the "victim" here. That's what I get for being the talents female in the group...)

They are about to carry me in this picture... Yihee...

Believe it or not, I felt tired even if I usually played the "victim."

Haircut Incident

2008-09-21T20:33:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, my husband and I decided to give our son another haircut -- his fourth. He cried his eyes and lungs out during his third time even if he had it at a haircut salon catering to babies and children. This time around, we went to the barber's shop in our neighborhood that my husband suggested because it said "kids haircut salon," too on its signage.

We thought that maybe if our son had a haircut at the same place and time his Dad is having one, then the stress and trauma will be less. We guessed wrong. :(

Polo didn't care if his Dad and Mom were both wearing the usual robe. He didn't want to wear one. Period. The friendly barber and I just wrapped a mini towel around Polo's neck.

Polo didn't care if we seated him in a child-friendly-barber's-chair-car that's situated right in front of a tv playing Barney. The car nor Barney, his friend, didn't do the trick.

Polo didn't care if I was seated on the barber's chair and carrying him all through out the haircut. Mommy's charms didn't work but from time to time, the Pizza Hut commercial and thoughts of spaghetti, pizza and chicken was able to temporarily distract him. Some times, singing fill-in-the-blanks Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star and Row, Row Your Boat did the trick but only momentarily...

Polo didn't even care if his father was seated in the barber's chair beside him, having his dreaded good-boy barber's cut (I say, "dreaded" because the usual barber's cut is not his dad's style. Polo's dad prefers the layered crop style of more modern haircutters). Polo just kept on crying and shouting (good thing, he wasn't physically violent).

The good old barber (who seemed like a scary stranger with a comb, a pair scissors and a razor to Polo), was skilled and patient enough to cut our little boy's thin hair. Once in a while, he tried to charm Polo but to no avail. In Polo's mind, the barber was the enemy. In Polo's one-year and seven-month's mind, all he wanted to do was get out of the shop and ride his Papa's car.

After an hour or so of torture for Polo, we all decided that his hair has been trimmed enough. Between sobs and deep breaths, Polo was comforted by his dad. We paid for the father & son haircut, said "bye" to the barbers and headed to the nearest happy place Polo knew -- Jollibee.

Polo was rewarded with a Jolly Sundae, Jolly Fries and a Jolly Meal Toy. In the happy place, it seems that the shadows of the barber shop incident have slowly melted away. Thanks to Jollibee, our little cub was sane again.

We're still on a quest to find a suitable happy-place hair salon for Polliepoe.

Thirty, Flirty and Thriving!

2008-09-21T19:50:00.000-07:00

That's the wish the 13-year old girl in the movie Thirteen Going Thirty made on her 13th birthday that magically turned her into a 30-year old lady the next day.

Thirty, Flirty & Thriving! - Yes, I'm thirty. I've been repeating this line in my head over and over again since July. Now, whenever I repeat it in my head, I'm no longer sad that my "youthful" 20s are over but I'm more excited about being a full-pledged adult! I no longer have time to waste. I must pursue my dreams, no longer make excuses for myself and jump into adventures that will define me.

Of course, I'm not flirty. I don't intend to put my beautiful marriage on the line here just because I'm in my 3rd decade. That's not the dream that I want to pursue or jump into without excuses, nor is that the adventure that will define. Rather, I will flirt with life itself. I will be more decisive in pursuing the bucket list I have in my head (which reminds me... I have to write it down one of these days). I have to be more daring in doing or trying things that I've set aside for a long time now like being involved in a good cause, getting back in shape, climbing a mountain, painting, etc!

Thriving. Yes, I'm thriving but more than that I want to soar! I want to stop focusing on my career and start soaring 360-degrees. I want to establish good and meaningful relationships with my husband, my son, my parents, my sisters, my in-laws, my girl-friends and my friends. I want to develop my other skills -- physical, artistic, mental, etc!

I have to admit that the reality of being 30 years old has changed me:
I’m more concerned about my skin. I now have a regular skin regimen for my face.
I'm also paying more attention to my hair. I iron it out every morning.
I'm more concerned about my body. I enrolled in a gym. Have to get back in shape.
I took up First Aid and Basic Life Support with CPR Trainings (thanks to the company I work for)
I’ve also established time with girl-friends and couple-friends
I also realized that it’s not worth it chasing shadows to push career. There are more important things in life than stressing over a certain desired designation.
I'm enriching my mind with Sudoku puzzles (that I grudgingly share with my husband) and with a Reader's Digest Asia subscription.
I'm extending my imagination by reading books. I just finished "Number the Stars", a thin paperback by Lois Lowry. I'm in the middle of "The First Wives Club" and "One Voice, Please" (a book my friend Macopa) lent me.

Do Good. Be Good. Stay Good.

2008-09-21T19:47:00.000-07:00

Reminder for the week:
"Refuse no one the good on which he has a claim when it is in your power to do it for him. Say not to your neighbor, “Go, and come again,tomorrow I will give,” when you can give at once. Plot no evil against your neighbor,against one who lives at peace with you. Quarrel not with a man without cause,with one who has done you no harm." Proverbs 3

Thanks to the book of Proverbs.

"The Scene is Safe. There is one victim lying on the floor..."

2008-09-16T22:58:00.000-07:00

"The scene is safe. There is one victim lying on the floor. I am Margaritajelly trained in First Aid. May I help?"

That is more or less the standard opening line I'll use in emergency cases from now on. Yep, I'm a trained First Aider. I took up First Aid and Basic Life Support and CPR in a training organized by our company.

Completing the training automatically makes me a First Aid volunteer should an emergency happen within the office. Based on the code of trained First Aiders, we should not refuse aid when necessary. I didn't think that it'll be mandatory but what the heck.

I enlisted for the training and even coerced my husband to sign up, too because we're parents now. A child is depending on us for his daily subsistence, growth and safety. Therefore, we should know first aid and basic life support. Simple. Hehehe. Unfortunate for my husband, his registration was declined but mine was accepted. It's better that one of us be trained than none at all, I guess.

After the 2-day session, I learned how to assist a victim in sitting up, standing up and walking. I know how to carry a victim or transfer him from one point to another by myself, with the help of another person or with the help of a group of people. I am equipped with a Red Cross Triangular Bandage and I know how to fold it and use to bandage wounds on the head, eye, hand, arm, foot and legs. I am now knowledgeable in CPG. I just hope that I won't panic (or go on weepy-weepy mode) when "duty" calls.

Talking about weepy-weepy... I cried during our CPG practical exams. In my head, I was thinking, "I've got to do this right because in real life scenarios, the victim's life survival (and life!) will depend on me." With that thought in mind, I checked if my hands and counting were correct and remembered that I was supposed to look at the face of the victim, which was a CPG half-body dummy at that time. Upon looking at the dummy's face, I imagined what it will be like in a real emergency situation. Then, it happened! Weepy-weepy mode came crawling in.

I felt sad that the victim (then dummy) was in a life-and-death situation. I felt desparation and frustration, thinking that the victim should have been revived by now (why will it have to take more than 5 cycles of 30 compressions and 2 mouth-to-mouth resuscitations-breaths?). Little by little, my emotions took the better of me. I had to stop in the middle of my practical exam, excuse myself and went to side to cry.

Nyak! Nyak! Nyak! Teary-eyed, red-nose and blushing, my mind brought me down memory lane. I remembered the grieving I experienced during my grandfather's death. I could taste the shock and helplessness I swallowed when I had a miscarriage. It all came back to me.

After 20-30mins, I was able to shrug it all off. Yeah, I literally had to shake away those tear-jerker fluffy stuff inside of me by jumping, moving around and shaking my arms and body. (What a weirdo, you might say? What can I do, I was borne into an emotionally sensitive family.) After 20-30mins, I was taking my practical exam again. This time around, I had enough strength to push back my tears and calm my nerves.

I guess, it's better to shed all my tears now during the exams than in real life. Hopefully, when the time comes, i'll be more emotionally stable.

My Personal Mid-Year Review

2008-09-07T23:10:00.000-07:00

Reviewing my 2008 to do list:

1. 12 scrapbook layouts for the year (or at least one per month)

-I'm way behind... :( I must look for a new hobby...

2. 54 blog entries or one entry per month

-Have a lot of catching up to do... Nyark!

3. Tapusin na ang wedding album and wedding video (Hello!!!)

-Wedding album, check! Wedding video and Portrait picture to go...

4. Print and organize our pictures in a photo album (all of them are just digital files eating up Marvin's disk space!)

-No progress here, yet...

5. Update my resume and send it out

-Done. I'm not seriously looking. Just want to know my options.

6. Read the Bible Daily

-Ummm... Needs improvement.

7. Renew my driver's license

-Check! I'm now driving our automatic car. Yahoo! It feels great. I've been driving on my own for at least 3 trips now. 1) From Makati-Pque; sunday night; thru the rain (difficulty level - almost high); 2)From our house to SM - daytime (difficulty level - low); 3)Pque-Makati-Pque (difficulty level - medium).

For this, I'd like to thank my husband for his trust in my driving capabilities, for the space he is giving me to learn, and for the "connections" he established, such that we were able to simplify my driver's renewal process.

8. Renew my passport

-Check! Check! Check! I even had my last name updated in my passport. Good girl.

9. Get a passport for Polo

- Red Flag alert blinking!!!

10. Better and deeper relationships

- Improving... :) Need to be consistent in this area.

11. Become a manager by year-end

- Still wishing for it but am thinking if it's that important...

12. Transfer house or find one of our own

- (Dead air)... I am grateful for the house that we're currently living in. I love the house. The environment and security is ideal.

13. Hire a good and worthy househelp/yaya

- Yaya is doing good. She's is often more like heaven-sent. Still praying that she'll stay for long. I thank God for her everytime I remember her and how she takes care of my son and the famly.

14. Report for work on time (God, help me)

-Slowly but surely, I'll get there. Hehehe...

15. Be on time for everything (The Lord of time, help me)

-Same status as # 14

16. Lose weight - go back to my pre-pregnancy weight of 128lbs

- Well, my APE results say that I'm overweight for my height. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know. I'm enrolling in the gym this month. I will start brisk-walking-semi-jogging activities with my friends.

17. Eat right, stay healthy

- Now more conscious of what I eat. Less junk food and sweets. Hope I keep this up. Keeping my fingers crossed.

18. Develop my cooking & baking skills -- cook/bake once a month

-Zero progress... My Tita gave me and my husband a campbell's cookbook as a gift on our birthday. I'll cook something from there soon. I'll write above it in the future, well, hopefully. Hehehe...

19. Go on dates with my Husband - once a month

-So far, so good... Keep it up!

20. Go on dates with Polo - once a month

-Dates with Polo are currently with my husband and I. When he grows up, we'll have mother-son bonding time.

21. Go on dates with my mom - once a quarter

-I owe my mom, 3 dates + 1 for Q4 of this year.

22. Go on dates with my parents - once a year

-I accompanied them to a Traditional Chinese Medical Doctor yesterday... We had some bonding time while waiting for China Doctor to arrive and we had lunch together in a nearby Chinese Cafeteria. I think that counts. Maybe, I can target more than 1 for this year.

23. Go on dates with my sisters - twice a year

-To be scheduled soon. Hope my Ate's hectic sched permits a sisterhood bonding achu... chu... chu... :)

Mama Mary's Birthday

2008-09-07T22:43:00.000-07:00

It's Mama Mary's Birthday today. I prayed to her this morning, asking her to bestow upon me the strength and goodness to be like her -- graceful, humble, sincere, and wise.

It's Mama Mary's Birthday today. The Gospel today details their family lineage. Can't help but think about our family's medical history and pray for the healing of all our generational illnesses.

It's Mama Mary's Birthday today. I'm reminded to be loving, sincere, considerate and caring.

It's Mama Mary's Birthday today. The people organizing the mass in the building near our office refused to let us in the theater to hear mass because the theater is full already. I hope my husband and I get to hear mass on time later. I'll have to file for undertime, though, but that's not a problem because it's Mama Mary's Birthday.

It's Mama Mary's Birthday today. I pray for her help and guidance as I discover motherhood. May she give me wisdom and patience.

It's Mama Mary's Birthday today. I pray for my Mom, my Mother-in-law, my sister (who's a mom, too) and all my friends and family who are moms. This entry is beginning to sound like a Mother's Day prayer. Wonder why Mother's Day and Mama Mary's Birthday didn't coincide in one day... I thank God for all of them. I pray for their children and their family. I pray for their health and well-being. May their spirits be filled with God's graces that sickness, confusion and chaos flee from their life.

It's Mama Mary's Birthday today. May all children love their mothers. May they learn deep respect and care for the ones who nursed them. May all orphaned children find comfort in the arms of Mama Mary. May all those seeking direction and love receive the warmth of Mama Mary's accepting arms.

It's Mama Mary's Birthday today. Let's all pause and pray. :)

Of spots and dots

2008-08-31T23:13:00.000-07:00

Last week, 2 dermas confirmed that I have vitiligo. It's a skin disorder where my immune system hinders my melanin-producing cells from producing melanin or skin pigment. This, thus, results to white spots on my skin.

Most say that there is no cause nor any certain cure. Some respond to the available treatments, others don't (Hmmm... ) .It can be hereditary - 50 % of those who have it, have relatives who have it also (As far, as my parents can trace, no one has it in our family) . It can also be caused by stress (Now, I see what's potentially causing it in me...).

I read about 2 herbal remedies in the internet (which I accessed through my SMART phone using WAP -- Yep, just wanted to endorse SMART a bit). One is Anti-Vitiligo from True Herbals. 45% of those who have used it, reorder. There are also testimonials displayed on the site about people whose pigments were restored.

Interesting! Hopeful.

The other one is Dermatint... Haven't read much about it. I'll update you guys.

Before going to the 2nd Derma consultation, I went to our company clinic to have the dots on my neck (otherwise known as warts) cauterized. I was expecting our company surgeon to put anesthesia on the dots before the cautery but I was surprised and a bit dismayed to know that anesthesia is only applied on dots on the face in his clinic. Bummer!!!

Anyway, I was decided to get rid of those small but many dots on my neck so I went through with it. I faced the music but didn't appreciate the rhythm much. The treatment was torture! I felt like I was being tortured for my sins. The instrument used had a needlepoint tip that was used to prick the dots at the same time burn them. The burning felt more like an electrocution. I cringed, shivered and perspired on the chair.

I felt like Manny Pacquiao after a boxing match -- though hurt and beaten, I emerged like a champion, a hero that braved it all.

Whew! That was such an ordeal. Btw, I still learned that I have dots on my face and some flesh-colored ones left on my neck. I'll have it done elsewhere next time around.

My derma pursuit continued on... After consulting about Vitiligo, I availed of the medical facial and acne surgery treatment offered in the Derma Clinic. I know, the terms seems to technically medical. I think that it's just one of their marketing efforts to make their treatments seem scientific and serious vs the regular commercialized treatments in most Derm-Spas.

The medical facial is a facial with steam and the works. The acne surgery treatment is for the removal of even smaller dots on my face that are commonly called as white and black heads.
I had a lot of black heads on my nose and chin. Eck!

After my spots and dots sessions, I decided to call it a day and went home. Afterwards, I started the skin maintenance (or beauty) regimen recommended at the Derma Clinic. I, now, wash my face, apply toner, followed by clarifying lotion and sunblock (in the am) or pore cleanser (in the pm) on my face. Hopefully, this will keep my facial skin in good shape til the next decade or so. For my Vitiligo spots, I also brought home some breastfeeding-friendly meds (That's until I completely weaned Polo off breastfeeding. Most of the serious meds for Vitiligo can only be used when I'm no longer nursing).

Now that I'm in my thirties, I take heed to Baz Luhrmann's advice in the song "Everybody's Free to Wear Sunscreen" -- "If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience…I will dispense this advice now.
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh nevermind; you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked…."

Pah-Cuhn!

2008-08-26T03:37:00.000-07:00

Pah-Cuhn - That's how Polo pronounces popcorn, our little family's favorite midnight snack. Be it in plain, kettle corn, butter or cheese flavor, this snack turns him up & about!

One midnight, Marvin cooked microwavable popcorn. He was shaking the container to wake me up and join him (it's not fun to eat popcorn by yourself, he thought). I woke up and munched on the popcorn as well. I think that the happy sound of our midnight munching was loud for bedtime that it woke Polo up.

Without flinching or thinking twice, he sat up and smiled at the sight and smell (!) of the popcorn. It almost seemed instinctive. He dug into the plastic container and joined in the midnight snack fun.

The other evening, we had popcorn for dessert. When the plastic container was close to being empty, Marvin told Polo that we finished the whole pack already. Polo moved towards us and was extremely delighted when Marvin brought out the microwavable popcorn pack and poured more popcorn into the plastic container. Polo said, "Waaaaaaaaaaaaw," (Polo's version of "Wow!") while marching in place and swaying left to right.

Aside from Pah-Cuhn, here are the common things that he says:

Word (Polo's pronunciation -- his own version)
Bath (Bah-t)
Feet (Fith)
Teeth (Tith)
Door (Douh)
Light (Layht)
Lola (Luh-Lah)
Lolo (Ugh-Ugh) - hehehe!
Lolo Dante (Ugh-Ugh 'Te or O'Te) - Hehehe! We often tease my dad about this.
Tita (Tah-Tah)
Tita Jaz (Tah-Jaz)
Tita Chi-Chi (Ta-Chi or 'Chi-Chi) - Chi prefers the 2nd option, of course
Comb - (Cuhm)
Brush - (Bah-sh)
Angry - ('Gree)
Yaya - (Yah-Yah)
Yaya Erlyn - (Yah-Yah Eh-Leehn or Yah Leehn)
Angel - (Nh-Gehl)
Diaper - (Purr)
Star - (Stah)
High - (Hahy)
Guard - (Gahd)
Amen - (Ey-men or 'Men)

He can also fill in the blanks of these statements:
Brush your ____ (teeth)
Comb your ____ (hair)
Change your ____ (diaper)

He can also fill in the blanks of the ff nursery rhymes:
Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star
Itsy-Bitsy Spider
Rain, Rain Go Away

Just last Saturday (Aug 30, 2008), I discovered that he learns how to count from 1 to 10! Yey!

He also knows how to march on command

Our Polliepoe is one year, six months and 11 days old and he's learning fast.

Cool Changes

2008-03-30T19:03:00.000-07:00

We transferred to a new house last March 15, 2008. We now reside in a 2-storey house with 4 bedrooms, 3 toilets, parking slots for 2 vehicles, a garden, a maid's room and enough space for Daddy's unused video and photography equipment and so much room for Polo to walk, run around and play in.

I love the neighborhood. It's secure, quiet and peaceful. I hear a lot of birds chirping in the morning. When I look out our window, I see the sky and our work-in-progress garden where my Mom and Dad planted flower-bearing plants. The stack of old that used to be in our room in the old house is now gone, all organized and neatly kept in our cabinets. When we step outside our room, we see a spacious living room to our left and a homey dining area and kitchen to our right. Another thing I love about the new place is that we never run out of water!!! Goodbye water shortage! Good bye water tank delivery! :) Wohoo!

Secondly, today marks my first day in the Product Marketing Team of SMART Money Activations. After around 4 years of being away from Product Marketing, I decided to go back. Thankfully, our company allowed me to jump around different teams and go back to where I started. So let's see how it goes. Hopefully, this time around, I'll stay longer. Hehehe.

"Look, Ma, No Cavities!"

2008-02-04T18:09:00.000-08:00

Polo's teeth received a Pedia Dentist's stamp of approval last Saturday, February 2. We can now teach him to say, "Look, Ma, No Cavities!," as the cute boy in Colgate's commercial would say.

It was Polo's first dental check up. His appointment was scheduled at 1pm (which didn't turn out to be a good schedule. It's not advisable to have a dentist check a baby's set of teeth after lunch because the baby is prone to throwing up his lunch if he cries too much). Instead of having lunch, we gave him a heavy breakfast and a light snack, as instructed by the Pedontist's assistant.

The clinic was child-friendly. It had books for children and stuffed animals hanging on the dentist's chair. Even the pedia dentist and her assistant looked fun as she was wearing a scrub suit with cute colorful animals.

Dra. Eala asked for our child's name. Upon saying, "Polo," she promptly said, "Oh, just like the candy." Dentista talaga! She then gave us a short orientation, saying that I will have to sit Polo on my lap, facing me and then let him lie down with his head landing on her knees. She also said that Polo will definitely cry because this will be a new experience for him but it won't be traumatic because it won't hurt.

That's exactly what we did. Using the dental mirror, she checked crying Polo's teeth (which only took less than 5 min) and then smeared fluouride on his 6 little teeth. That's it! It was definitely quick! What followed after was what took long -- consultation. She asked us about Polo's eating habits, diet and dental hygiene. She also gave us tips and allowed us to ask questions.

That's how it went and then she charged us a sizeable amount for the whole thing. :) But we didn't mind because it will be another year til we have Polo's teeth checked up again... because his 6 little milk teeth are cavity and problem-free!

Race On!

2008-01-29T17:49:00.000-08:00

Since November 2007, I have been planning for Polo's 1st Birthday Party. I got in touch with close to twenty establishments, asking for quotations, party packages for a children's party and stuff. Finally, last January 25, I made up my mind. National Sports Grill was our final choice. Marvin and I signed the conforme and paid the 50% down payment for the venue of Polo's 1st Birthday.

It was the best choice after all, the theme of our party is racing cars. How can it not be about cars when Polo's line of interest is anything that has four wheels and goes vrrrroooom, vrooooom! When he sees cars or vehicles on tv, on the street or sees toy cars, he'll drop everything and inspect the underchasis, the wheels and say "vrrrooom, vroooom..." with gusto! Hehehe... Sometimes, he even pretends that our tv remote control is a car. If we give him a cookie during meal time, expect that he'll say "vroooom, vroooom..." and drag the cookie like it's a car before he bites it.

Let's park Polo's fascination about cars and vehicles and go back to my party planning checklist:

Venue - NSG, 3rd Level, Greenbelt 3, Check!

Party Decor - c/o Tanunings, Check!

Party Host and Magician - c/o Tanunings, Check!

Game Prizes - bought them myself at Divisoria, Check!

Loot Bags - bought them myself at Divisoria, Check!

Invites - artsy-craftsy work in progress, THIS MUST BE RELEASED NEXT WEEK!

Signature Book - sourced out 2 supplier options, still need to compile the pictures.

Gift for Polo - Check! Marvin bought it last Sunday. He couldn't resist the urge to buy something for Polo whenever they are out together in a mall. Hope Marvin isn't tempted to open our gift for Polo before his birthday.

Audio Visual Presentation - I deligated this to Marvin. Hope he starts working on it this week.

Birthday Cake - c/o Just For Kids, the kids version of Kink Cakes. We placed our order last Sunday and paid for 50% of the cost as well. Check!

A couple of things left and the race is on to Polo's 1st Birthday Party! Well, that's until we release the invites.

Out in the market, once again

2008-01-29T17:35:00.000-08:00

I have already accomplished my Goal # 5. I already downloaded my updated resume from Jobstreet DB and sent it out one manpower consulting firm and to 2 companies in need of product/brand/marketing managers. I'm praying that I'll find a new job before the quarter ends. :)

I have mixed emotions on this one. I'm excited to conquer new territory at the same time that I'm perplexed about the new challenges that will be set before. I am hopeful, however, that my whirlwind 7-year experience in SMART has seasoned me and chiseled me into a heavy-duty marketing person.

On the mommy side, I'm looking forward to weaning Polo from Breastmilk to Formula. February 25 will be the day. I expect that I'll feel some sense of liberation but I'm sure that I would still experience separation anxiety. Hehehe... What can I do? Breastfeeding is an experience that ties the heart of a mom to her child.

Slowly shifting from Breastfeeding to formula-feeding will also give me some room to take on new responsibilities and challenges at work. I'm ready now to stretch myself once more and strive for excellence in work and at home.

... So help me, God. Amen.

Let the Heavens Rejoice

2008-01-03T18:50:00.000-08:00

"Let the sea and what fills it resound,the world and those who dwell in it;Let the rivers clap their hands,the mountains shout with them for joy before the LORD." Psalm 98

This is my struck for today. It is a command to rejoice and be happy. So be it. Be happy, my heart. :)

Reading the words of this psalm reminds me of my old tambourine dancing days in the BLD Youth Ministry. I miss dancing and singing for the Lord will all my might. I miss serving the Lord.

First and Foremost

2008-01-03T18:35:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year! Here are my Goals for this year:

12 scrapbook layouts for the year (or at least one per month)
54 blog entries or one entry per month
Tapusin na ang wedding album and wedding video (Hello!!!)
Print and organize our pictures in a photo album (all of them are just digital files eating up Marvin's disk space!)
Update my resume and send it out
Read the Bible Daily
Renew my driver's license
Renew my passport
Get a passport for Polo
Better and deeper relationships
Become a manager by year-end
Transfer house or find one of our own
Hire a good and worthy househelp/yaya
Report for work on time (God, help me)
Be on time for everything (The Lord of time, help me)
Lose weight - go back to my pre-pregnancy weight of 128lbs
Eat right, stay healthy
Develop my cooking & baking skills -- cook/bake once a month
Go on dates with my Husband - once a month
Go on dates with Polo - once a month
Go on dates with my mom - once a quarter
Go on dates with my parents - once a year
Go on dates with my sisters - twice a year

Trick or Treat? Treat!

2007-11-07T17:43:00.000-08:00

Trick or Treat was officially celebrated in our office last Oct 26. After much deliberation (or fickle-mindedness on my part!), Marvin and I finally decided to bring Polo to the office to join the festivities.

We dressed him up with the angel cum dove costume he wore at the 1st birthday costume party he went to (that was the 1st birthday party of Isabella Escano, first born of Rad & Puchette Escano). His baby attire was composed of a light blue jumpsuit (aka pajamas), a pair of white feathery wings and his white bonnet with glittery silver and baby blue adornments (which I designed myself. Ye!). Much to my surprise, our little boy blue angel bagged the best in costume award given at Marvin's floor.

Here's a picture Polo in his award winning costume. Hehehe...

Must admit that he really looks angelic most of the time (Of course, I'm subjective and biased! I'm his Mama. Hahaha)!

Wonderful Babblings

2007-11-07T17:26:00.000-08:00

It started with "Aba aba aba aba..." that later on became "Ba ba ba ba" that morphed into "Pa pa pa pa" when he was jolly and playful and "Ma ma ma ma" whenever he was hungry, needy or crying. Now, it seems that he knows who his Papa and Mama are because he looks at us when he calls for us, depending on his needs.

That's our Polliepoe at 8 months! Whenever he calls out to Marvin during playtime, Marvin's heart cannot but dance with glee. I, on the other hand, cannot refuse the gentle but pitiful tug I feel in my heart whenever he cries out for me when he needs comfort or is just plain hungry.

We initially wanted our little boy to call us Daddy and Mommy. But Papa and Mama seems to be Polo's preference. Good choice, Polo! To me, "Papa" and "Mama" brings life and music to my heart. It even surpasses Mozart's classical masterpieces!

There you go, folks, "Papa" and "Mama" are Polo's 1st words. I'm sooo damn happy that it didn't turn out to be just any other word. :)

Steady Flow

2007-10-18T19:08:00.001-07:00

Breastfeeding is steady now that Polo is eating solid foods 3 times a day. I pump and store 12 to 16oz of milk everyday for Polo's daily consumption. Whew! So far, so good (until he goes through another growth spurt... "Ayayay!," as the yellow dino Barney-friend BJ would say).

We're praning na to leave Polo alone on the bed. He already fell off the bed 2 times -- once during his grandparents' watch when he fell and landed on 2 pillows, and once during my watch, where even a floor rug didn't save him from scoring a bump on his forehead (tsk! tsk! tsk! negative points for me, his mommy). Good thing, Lola Annie is teaching Polo to play and sleep in his crib or playpen during the day. That means less accident hazards for Polo. Whew!

However, Marvin and I are still amateurs in getting Polo to settle down in his crib. He's used to staying on our bed whenever we're around. That's why it becomes quite a struggle for us to leave him in his crib before we go to the office in the morning.

It can be quite frustrating and sad to leave him crying in his crib. He actually doesn't really cry out loud but since he still doesn't know how to use words, crying is all he has. Funny thing nga lang is that when we're already out of his sight, ayun! He usually stops crying. Hmmm... Crying must be his way of telling us that he doesn't want us to go just yet.

It's also cool to observe how he bahaves differently during his Lola Annie's watch vs. our watch. When Lola Annie is taking care of him, he is more behaved. He doesn't cry as much when left to play in his crib or playpen. He is even amenable to sleep in his crib with Lola Annie humming to him "deep and wide," a Christian Song for Children, while patting his leg until he dozes off. Sometimes, he would even fall asleep by himself.

During our watch, he would agree to play in his crib or playpen but if he is already sleepy, he will cry and won't stop until we carry him (or I breastfeed him to sleep). We tried putting him to sleep in his crib but he would only cry, as if telling us "Eh nandyan naman kayo, bakit ninyo ako pinapatulog dito? Gusto ko katabi ko kayo..."

This only goes to show that he can differentiate us from his Lola Annie. Or maybe, we have already conditioned him to act this way. Sanayan lang kumbaga... If you ask me, I'm still glad that he knows how to be less demanding when he's with Lola Annie. Lola Annie is too old to worry much about him. :) I'm also happy that he cries whenever Marvin and I are around to take care of him because it's his little way of expressing his wanting to be near to us, which is the sweetest thing.

His Throne

2007-10-18T18:48:00.000-07:00

Time is ticking swiftly away! Polo is now bigger than the car-seat basinette we borrowed from my sister. He used to sit there whenever we feed him but last week, it was time for him to make yet another transition.

After a month or so of surveying at the malls, Marvin and I finally decided to buy our Polliepoe a high chair. We bought him a wooden one that can be converted into a table and chair when he becomes a toddler.

The chair was relatively a new design released in the market. There are even plastic versions of it that come in Looney Tunes and other character designs. Being a fan of classic designs (and more affordable stuff! hehehe), I chose the wooden version. Marvin asked for the colored blue seat cushion.

As soon as we got home, Daddy and Marvin immediately assembled it. We were all excited to have Polo try it out (aside from the fact that we already had him test the same type of chair many times in different SM mall branches. Well, this one is different. It was his very own chair. That's until he gets another sibling. Hahaha!). So after 30minutes of assembling time (which I think even reached 1 hr in reality), we sat our baby Polo in his chair.

He was happy. With the added height of his high chair, he saw everything in the house from a new perspective, literally speaking. No longer did he see everything and everyone from an ant's point of view. Now, he was more or less mid-level (even eye level when all of us are seated).

Pictures of him to follow... :)

Time to Move...

2007-10-01T18:51:00.000-07:00

When Polo turned 7 months and learned how to crawl and sit unassisted, he immediately became more mobile that the pillows used to keep him within his playmat area could no longer stop him. Aba! He could now climb over the pillows and push them further so as to increase his territory.

His white wooden crib, his parents' bed and his puzzle floormat are no longer safe places for him. That is why Marvin, Mommy and I decided that it was time for us to buy him a playpen. That's exactly what we did before going home last friday night.

With Polo's transition into a playpen and yet another baby furniture added to our home space, Marvin thought that it was indeed, time to keep Polo's bouncy chair and puzzle floormat. It was time to keep the bouncy chair for the next baby and the puzzle floormat for later when Polo is old enough to move out of his playpen.

Our Polliepoe is gradually growing into his own person. He is learning inch by inch that he is independent from Marvin and me. Thank God that these things happen slowly, thus, giving me time to adjust and adapt.

It was not so long ago that I thought that parenting meant teaching your baby what and how to do things. Little did I know that parenting happens the other way around. Without the baby knowing it, it is he who turns his Mom and Dad into parents.

It's back

2007-09-27T00:13:00.000-07:00

My breastmilk supply is gaining momentum. Yay! All it took was diligence. I dunno why I'm so undisciplined when it comes to scheduling my activities. I gotta be more organized.

Anyway, I realized this week that I need to give myself a pat on the back for breastfeeding exclusively for 7 months now (As a reward, I deserve more Magnolia Vanilla and Strawberry Ice Cream!!! Hahaha). How did I come to such realization???

Well, I bumped into some of my mommy friends, who got pregnant and gave birth the same time I did and when we would talk about breastfeeding, aba! ako na lang ang breastfeeding and doing it exclusively (without giving formula)! I found it a bit surprising. Didn't think that I was patient and perservering enough to be the "last one standing." Hehehe...

It's even funny how one of my officemates, who gave birth 2 months ago, uses me as her benchmark and breastfeeding "idol." She even feels pressured to match the amount of milk I pump and produce and thinks to her self that she can't match up.

To her consolation, she doesn't need to produce as much milk as I do because every baby's consumption is unique. Likewise, every breastfeeding Mom's supply depends on her baby's demand. In Filipino, kanya-kanya pacing lang yun.

... So after all my breastfeeding crisis panic mode, I'm doing well after all. Whew!

Managers are Out

2007-09-27T00:07:00.000-07:00

All the managers in our division are out in a team building today and I feel like blogging, facebook-ing, and updating my multiply site all day! Work and mommy stuff have been keeping me away from the internet. How I wish I could blog, upload pictures everyday! Haaay...

More than a Little Game

2007-09-26T23:36:00.000-07:00

I was feeling quite low when I came home from work yesterday. I think I am in a middle of personal crisis. To use, "I think," only means that I am in a bit of a denial stage here (har! har! har!) I've been feeling like this for more than a week now and I am getting tired of my torturing thoughts. Lagot yang mga thoughts na yan sa 'kin! I'll get rid of them soon! Hah!

Anyway, while I was harboring all these mixed feelings in my heart and mind, Polo, who was in in the middle of our bed, beside me and my husband, decided to play a game. He played with his Daddy Marvin, rolled-over, crawled all over, glanced at the tv and then stopped to get my attention in between his cute little baby activities. He kept stopping to look at me, catch my attention, stare me in the eye and then finally smiled when I would smile at him. I tell you, he did this like every 20-30 seconds for 20 minutes.

Hehehe... It felt like he knew that I was having a low day. It seemed as if he was checking up on me, making sure that I wouldn't get all caught up in my world of noisy thoughts. Ganun talaga! He wouldn't move or smile until I looked at him and smiled.

He is such a charmer, a heaven-sent angel at that!

Thank God for Polo Bebe who never fails to surprise me with simple joys that mean more than what One Million Dollars can buy.

More than Random Stuff

2007-09-23T12:16:00.000-07:00

It's almost 3:30am and I'm still awake. I searched the net for resources I'll need for a personal Christmas project (which I will reveal within the month, hopefully...). I also catched up on Facebook (it's really addicting!).

Polo just turned 7 months last friday. Wohoo! 5 months to go and I'll probably think of giving up breastfeeding. Talking about breastfeeding... I think, Polo is in another growth spurt (if there is still such a thing for 7 month old infants). It seems that his milk demand has increased! Since, breastfeeding is a supply and demand kind of thing, my supply is yet to follow suit. I had to go on half day leave last thursday and friday morning to nurse him because the milk that I stored the day before didn't seem enough. :-S Good thing, I had the weekend to adjust.

I must admit that I may have been complacent a couple of weeks back. Thinking that I'll never run out of milk, I haven't been dedicated in taking my malunggay pills, drinking enough glasses of water and been lax in my breastpumping schedule. The down-side of it is that, it's my fault. The good-side of it is that I can still do something about it.

That's why over the weekend, I went back to taking my routine. I hope and really pray that my supply will come as expected.

+++

Polo's milestones: He started crawling last saturday. It wasn't the usual 360-degree pivoting on his stomach kind of thing. This time around, he used his feet and arms to push himself forward to get his toy. Cool! Marvin was surprised and ecstatic.

Today, he managed to balance himself in a sitting position. We've been practicing him to sit down with assistance -- our legs and tummies or pillows as support. Tonight, while I was preparing food that his Lola will give him tomorrow (homemade applesauce, yum!), Marvin positioned him on the play mat found in our sala. To everyone's astonishment, Polo sat upright for more than 20-30 minutes. Yey!

These are wonderful milestones I will keep dear in my heart. I'm taking time out now to take note of them before time watermarks them away like footprints in shifting sand.

Not be side-tracked

2007-09-10T20:06:00.000-07:00

"See to it that no one captivate you with an empty, seductive philosophy according to the tradition of men, according to the elemental powers of the world and not according to Christ."
Col 2

Now that Marvin and I are learning to become financially educated, smart and wise, I must not lose sight of my Christ's calling to serve and love.

Now, what is the exact details of my calling and purpose? I need to pause for a while and think it through. Seems that I have lost track of my sense of being, my mission and vision for my life. I must retrace my steps before I become totally clueless.

Before and After

2007-09-05T18:44:00.000-07:00

The wonders of technology has allowed us to get a glimpse of babies before they are born. He is Polo's 4D Ultrasound when he was 7-8 months in my womb and his 1 day old picture.

Of course they look alike. They are one and the same person. :)

This is Polliepoe today.

Picture was taken at around 5am this morning.

Yep, he was up and about that early!

Yummy!!!

2007-08-28T19:13:00.000-07:00

Aug 21 was a National Holiday but the Philippine government decided to move the holiday one day earlier. Polo turned 6 months on Aug 21 but since Marvin and I didn't have work on Aug 20, we decided that giving Polo's his first spoonful of solid food a day early wouldn't hurt.

And Polo's 1st solid food is... (drum roll, pls.)

Mashed Carrots!!!

I took care of the food preparation

Mashed carrots didn't do that to his hair. It's really like that.

But it made his eyes look bigger and open wider!!!

I hope it doesn't make his ears grow long and his two front teeth come out big. LOL!!!

3 weeks after... Mashed potatoes and mashed squash has been added to his menu list. Wonder what we'll let him taste next week...

Thanks to Polo, I am now a Mother

2007-08-22T19:52:00.000-07:00

After blogging about Marvin's 1st Father's Day, I decided that I should capture the highlights of my 1st Mother's Day, as well. So here it goes.

Just like our Father's Day Celebration for Marvin, my 1st Mother's day was celebrated in 2 days.

Day1

Marvin promised his officemate, Palom that we'll attend her church wedding that day. We didn't confirm our attendance at their reception because we thought that it would be too late for Polo... So there we were, getting all dressed up with formal attire that saturday morning. Marvin took out his formal barong while I readied my cocktail dress (the only formal wear that still fit me at that time). Polo, on the other hand, didn't have any formal wear so he wore the most dashing onesies he had at that time (thanks to Tita Pia for that!). We almost missed to the church wedding. We arrived during communion. We made it a point to greet Palom and her husband before we left (as proof that we really were there... hehehe).

Since we were all dressed up and had no where to go, we decided to head to my favorite resto in Makati for an intimate family celebration of Mother's Day. Italianni's!!! Love it! Marvin left the task of ordering our food to me. Fickle me finally decided on getting Ziti and their newest Pizza flavor for us. I was delighted because they all turned out to taste sooooo delicioso!

Italianni's!!! I so love this place.

Smoke Salmon Dill ... (something) Pizza. It was a new menu item that time. It's a must try.

Determined to enjoy our mini celebration, we made it a point to take our time and not fret about Polo. True enough, we kept our cool in feeding him. Polo seemed interested to join in our meal so Marvin and I took turns in feeding him milk by the bottle. Since it was a Mother's Day celebration, Marvin took the 1st shift in nursing Polo while I had my fill of our Italian treat.

Marvin on feeding duty, 1st shift

I took the 2nd shift (and then had ate my 2nd serving of pizza and ziti).

Day 2

I woke up early in the morning to express milk for Polo and get ready for a busy day. Even as early as 6am, there were people texting me to send greetings. I used to receive such greetings from friends before. However, the greetings would be addressed to my Mother. This time around, it was different. The text messages were for me and hey, they went straight to my heart. It's like everyone understood the sacrifices, hardships and joys a new mom experiences.

Early in the morning, we headed to Christ the King to attend the Christening of Polo's kumpare, Luis Alleandre. Luis' parents Claire and Vlad decided to make me his Godmother. We weren't able to join Luis' reception but heard mass instead.

Polo with Luis

After that, we met up with my Mommy, Daddy, Jaz at my sister Joanne's house in Cubao. We celebrated Mother's Day with the Tan Clan. We exchanged gifts. I gave Ate and Mommy Mother's Day cards with personalized messages that made me cry even as I wrote them. Hehehe... Marvin and I also promised Mommy a free massage treat at the Spa, which she scheduled the next day. Ate Jo gave me a giraffe stuff toy for Polo and a kikay headband. While, Jaz gave me a cool set of turquiose earrings with a note that kinda said "thank you for being my 2nd mom."

In the afternoon, we all decided to go to Eastwood.

All the Mara ladies... malling in Eastwood

To end the day, we had a dinner feast at Somethin' Fishy. I got a special kiss from my Honey as well.

How sweet!!! One of the best gifts I received for Mother's Day. O yeah, btw, Marvin and Polo gave me a Happy Birthday Card for Mother's Day. Late did Marvin realize that the tune played by the "singing" card was "happy birthday to you..." Just the same, I was touched by their message. :0 Kakaiyak!!!

A Winning Creation

2007-08-22T04:12:00.000-07:00

I won!!! Wohoo!!!

Our company organized a design your own paperboat contest. Deadline for submission of entries was yesterday. Inspired by the words of Bo Sanchez in his book, 8 Secrets of the Truly Rich, I pursued one of my main interests and used one of my core gifts (Naks!!! I'm still figuring out how I can turn it into something money making, though...).

So viola! Here it is, my entry. My very own paperboat. :)

It's not your typical folded-origami paperboat but it still is made out of paper. One of the organizers of the contest told me that out of 25 entries, they chose my paperboat because I was the only one who thought of a non-folded paperboat. Cool! Talk about thinking out of the box.

So there, since creativity is one of my core gifts and interests, I decided to find opportunities to use and hone my skills. This contest will be a small stepping stone for me. :) I'll be on the look out for similar opportunities.

I wonder what my prize will be. It might be a pen or a promo item (Though I hope it will be a trip around the world... SMART Link is the sponsor of the company contest, anyway... hehehe). Well, whatever the prize may be, I'll still cherish it as a wonderful trophy for my creativity. :)

My Babies are Sick

2007-08-01T21:37:00.000-07:00

Polo is sick. He has been coughing since last Monday. Marvin is sick, he's been down with cough since last week. I am the only one in our small nuclear family that is still well and healthy.

This is the second time Polo got sick. The first time was with viral as Doctors would call it. He had colds. He was melancholic and lethargic then but after a few days, he got better and was moving and smiling actively. Now, with his cough, he only has gotten worse after 4 days.

This morning, I decided to leave the house late in order to nurse Polo before going to the office. I left him with my Mom while I took a bath and got ready to go to work. While I was dressing up, my Mom came to me worried about Polo's continuous coughing. It was quite non-stop. So we went to my Mom's room to settle him down. We laid him with his back on a pillow and made him to lie down sidewards. He continued coughing until white mucous came out of his mouth. Shocked, I didn't get to respond immediately. Instead of finally coughing it out, Polo ended swallowing it all up again. Yikes...

He is more active now than when he had colds but whenever Marvin and I hear him cough, we are saddened with helplessness and concern.

I ended going to the office late this morning. Late for my 10am mtg and distracted from work. Yeah, things are different now that I am a Mom, especially now that I am nursing a sick son (and husband...). I now have to juggle work and family. I now have to learn to shift my focus from family to work and back again.

There's a bit of a struggle for me considering that I am a focused worker. Focused worker, meaning, I zero in on my task at hand when working. I can handle multi-tasking but my current job already entails a lot of multitasking that to add other stuff like family matters is quite a stretch for me.

Well, if I envision being an excellent working mom, then I better learn the ropes and start my balancing act, right? Ok, then. Well, back to work, Jopay.

What do you call it?

2007-07-17T18:55:00.001-07:00

Male bonding. That's what I call it. :)

I'm sure a few years more and Polo would no longer agree to this. Hehehe...

A Vision of Calm Blue Peace

2007-07-11T18:08:00.000-07:00

The other night, I pondered about who I am and how I deal with friendship and relate with people when the feeling of insecurity visited me. Thoughts of past rejection and grade school friendship hurts caused me to shed a couple of tear before I closed my eyes and fell asleep. What a way to shush oneself to sleep, you would say, right?

I would say that the way I woke up the day after was so much better. A vision of calmness, identity and dignity was my morning visitor. That's why.

In a dream, I had a vision of my Lolo Andy. We were all gathering to visit him in the ICU of a hospital. I could sense that his condition was bad because my Ate, Mom and Tita Mina were standing outside the ICU door with teary eyes and red noses. Instead of going straight to Lolo's room, Marvin, Jaz, and I with Polo went straight to our room (I wonder if one of us was sick because we had our own room). After settling down in our room, I found Polo awake so I decided to bring him with me to visit Lolo.

When we entered Lolo's room, everyone else was busy eating and chatting as if it were a merienda gathering. I looked to the hospital bed and only saw my cousins and Tita's sitting on the bed so I asked for Lolo. "Gising pa ba siya, gising pa ba siya?" (Is he still awake, is he still awake?) was what I asked everyone in an almost panicky tone. No one actually answered me. They all gave me a certain look as if asking me to rephrase my question. I only understood their weird gazes at me when I finally found Lolo, sitting on a chair quite far from his bed. He turned to face me with a smile that answered my concern. Yes, I am so much awake as I am alive. He held his own paper plate filled with Filipino merienda. Relieved and a bit surprised, I greeted him and presented Polo to him for the first time (In my dream, Polo is as old as he is now -- 4 months old). Lolo acknowledged Polo without saying a word and smiled at me. After a few minutes in the room, Polo and I left the room as if our mission was accomplished.

His hair was all white and shaved. His face was clear from facial hair. His eyebrows and eyelashes were dark black. He was pretty much healthy and well. What struck me about the vision was his eyes. They were clear blue, the color of a calm clean sea. When I looked into them, my inner being was calmed and at peace.

As soon as the dream ended, I woke up and cried. This is the second time Lolo Andy visited me in a dream. At both instances, I ended up crying. I cry because I am touched by his presence. Thinking of him and even encountering him in my subconsciousness, puts me at ease. Maybe this is because thoughts of him remind me of the heritage of values and integrity he left for us to live and the abundant treasure of talents and passion his blood line has given us as inheritance.

My vision of him seems to oppose my feelings of insecurity. It seems that he visits my dreams to remind me to hold my head up and be secure in knowing that I am a unlike most. I am my own, unique and special. :)

Such Comfort

2007-07-11T17:45:00.001-07:00

It was not so long ago when poopoo time was the constant thing that made Polo smile. I know that it's weird but I guess, it has something to do with the relief he feels everytime he poops.

Now, he smiles every single time he wakes up to see Marvin and I by his side. When he wakes up in the morning, when rocks and headbangs himself to wakefulness in the middle of the night, when his sleep is disrupted by his father's sneeze or snore (ye!) anytime of the day, he'll smile as long as his parents are the first ones he sees.

His smile is not any ordinary smile. It comes with a certain cute-shy-may-i-melt-with-happiness expression. Marvin and I keep recounting the moments we see him react this way whenever he sees us when he wakes up.

I love it. Not just because it's cute and heart-melting but mostly because it shows that he recognizes who his parents are and finds security, comfort and joy whenever he acknowledges our presence. Look at it this way, instead of waking up crying in the middle of the night, he actually looks for us and then smiles upon spotting us right beside him. Awww...

When God Blessed Jacob

2007-07-08T18:58:00.000-07:00

“I, the LORD, am the God of your forefather Abrahamand the God of Isaac;the land on which you are lyingI will give to you and your descendants.These shall be as plentiful as the dust of the earth,and through them you shall spread out east and west, north and south.In you and your descendantsall the nations of the earth shall find blessing.Know that I am with you;I will protect you wherever you go,and bring you back to this land.I will never leave you until I have done what I promised you.”

This is part of today's 1st reading. It's God's promise to Jacob. I claim it as my own and receive God's blessing upon my life and upon my family.

Thank you, Lord for your love, faithfulness and promise to always be with us, protect us wherever we go, and never leave us until Your promises come to pass.

In my heart of hearts I know that we will receive your promise of abundance, security, service, peace, joy and love. Amen.

Daddy Marvin

2007-06-25T20:55:00.000-07:00

Commemorating Marvin's 1st Father's Day... We had a 2 day celebration to honor Marvin.

Marvin & Polo at Bonifacio High Street

Day1: June 16, Saturday

Our small family nucleus (Marvin, Polo and I plus Rissa - our new household helper) headed to Dr. Joey's clinic in Manila Doctor's for Polo's pre-4th month check up. He'd be vaccinated once again. This time around it will be the 5-in-1 type.

Polo lying on Doc Joey's weighing scale

We arrived at the hospital at 11am, an hour earlier than Doc Joey's clinic schedule. Polo was Doc Joey's #3 patient in line. We laid Polo on the clinic's weighing scale. Ala! He is now 4+ lbs heavier and 10cm longer! His built is that of a 6-month old baby. Way to go, Polo! Your Dad's hopes of having a 6-footer son is within reach. Hehehe!

Full view of Polo rocking Doc Joey's weighing scale

When Doc Joey saw Polo, he pinched his cheeks and made funny faces to connect and play with Polo. He lectured us about dental stuff, warned us against using a walker because it prohibits the correct development of "walking" muscles and adviced us against exposing Polo to too much tv. Goodbye GKNB, Wowowee, and evening teleseryes for Polo! Hahaha!

The Agustins and the Ortiz-Luis at Congo Grille, SM MOA

The Daddies exchanging bottle-feeding notes

After 2 hrs or so, we were now headed to SM Mall of Asia to have a pre-Father's Day lunch with our couple friends Phipo-Roda+Ethan and Arland-Tina. Phipo, Roda and Ethan reserved a table and ordered lunch at Congo Grille. Arland and Tina couldn't make it that early so we met them for merienda instead. The highlight of our lunch was Papa Piolo Pascual, our surprise guest!

Papa Piolo!!! with the starstuck Daddies with their clueless sons

Piolo came in the restaurant in the middle of our late lunch meal. Apparently, Watson's was having a presscon there to launch a new scent that Piolo was endorsing. It was a good day for Piolo to dropby. His presence made Marvin and Phipo's pre-Father's Day get-together a bit more exciting. Kaya ayun, the Dads and their sons didn't pass up the photo opportunity with Papa Piolo! Marvin with Polo and Phipo with Ethan had easy access to Piolo. They didn't need to fall in line and go through the tight security guarding Piolo outside the resto.

Look at the security guarding Piolo outside Congo Grille!

Phipo, Roda and Ethan had to leave right after our meal while we waited a few more hours to meet up with Arland and Tina for merienda at Sugarhouse. Marvin and I shared a slice of apple pie. I'm sure Polo tasted it in his milk later that evening. :)

We went home at around 6pm but not without stopping by SM Dept store, which is Polo's favorite Mall, to buy diapers and socks for Polo. Polo's diaper size has been upgraded to Medium as well as his socks for his growing feet.

Day2: Mass at Sanctuario de San Antonio with Tita Jaz, Lolo and Lola then Dinner at Bonifacio High Street with the Tans

We heard mass at 4:30pm. I was brave enough not to bring supply of milk for Polo. Good thing he showed signs of hunger only towards the end of the mass. I fed him in the car on the way to Bonifacio High Street.

Capturing the sunset at Serendra

At Bonifacio High Street, we walked around and took pictures to commemorate Marvin's 1st Father's Day. We also checked out Serendra since it was our first time to go there. While walking, we bumped into a number of familiar faces: Cathy Bodestyne - now married with 2 sons was with her family and parents; The Parrenos were there celebrating Father's Day while entertaining a balikbayan guest; Tito Edwin, an art director family friend dropby to give Lolo Dante a painting he made; A biking buddy kababata (I forgot his name... hehehe) was having dinner with a friend; 2 officemates with their respective families; and 2 former Scholastican schoolmates were checking out the stores there.

Father & Son moment

Dinner was at Brother's Burger, the more affordable resto in the area that served food good for Isaiah and Praise, my pamangkins. Couldn't get enough of their onion rings and french fries! I munched down a lot of those right after feeding Polo in the car (for lack of a better breastfeeding station in the area). After Dinner, the Tans headed to Timezone for rounds of videoke fun, which was Tyrone's Father's Day wish come true. Lolo and Lola and Tita Jaz joined in the fun while we, the Agustins strolled Polo around the area.

The whole clan waiting for our dinner at Bros Burger

We bought Hillsongs' newest CD for Daddy Marvin and another Kids Song Praise CD for Baby Polo. It was almost 10pm when we decided to have dessert at Krispy Kreme. We ordered 2 dozen of donuts. I had the french crueler (not sure if the spelling is correct), lemon filled donut and a regular honey glazed one. Yup, I decided to have my fill of the famous Krispy Kreme before heading home to finally put tired Polo to bed.

The 1st born Agustin and 1st born Tan posing with Lolo and Lola at Krispy Kreme

That was our Father's Day treat for Daddy Marvin. At the end of the day, we were happy to spend all our energies making that day memorable.

End-of-day Agustin Family Pic

Crying Over Spilled Milk

2007-06-25T19:22:00.000-07:00

This morning I reluctantly disposed 2oz of breastmilk. I expressed it early this morning then went back to sleep only to find it being feasted on by ants after two hours. How could I have been sooo complacent???

I was too numb to cry over the loss. It hurts to see my labor of love go down the drain just like that. Oh well, I have to let that go and cling to the Sole Provider of All Good Things and trust that He will make a way and provide. (",)

I Don't Mind

2007-06-13T23:52:00.000-07:00

My boss called me in for a one-on-one mtg this afternoon and briefed me about the changes our organization will undergo.

In sumo total, instead of reporting directly to her, I'll report to a manager.

How does this affect me? Well, I don't mind. I don't see it a demotion or anything. I admit that there's still a lot for me to learn and my new manager can definitely provide that.

How about my chance for a promotion? Well, I don't mind. I'll be promoted when I'm ready. It will come. As I see it, right now, I'm not yet ripe.

I also know that the Captain of My Ship will transport me from here to there in due time so I don't mind. :)

Precious Moments

2007-06-13T23:31:00.000-07:00

This morning I woke up at 5am, as I usually do, to nurse Polo. Half-asleep, he stops crying and actively starts gulping down the milk he nurses. After a few minutes, he is sleeping yet again, gently stops nursing and then, smiles. Awww... what a sweet smile. Still asleep, he flashes me a couple more heart-melting reassuring smiles. That's how he reciprocates the love and comfort I give him. I smile back to respond to his sweet dreamy gesture and hold dear in my heart precious moments like this that would last forever. :)

A Breastfeeding Mom's New Gadget

2007-06-11T19:06:00.000-07:00

I feel like I gained earned extra powers. My new breastpump is electric and it's a Medela!

I've been dreaming about owning a breastpump like this even before giving birth to Polo. When I gave birth to Polo, I wasn't really sure if I would be able to breastfeed so I made do with the Pigeon manual breastpump I borrowed from my sister. After using my sister's pump for a few days, my hand started to ache so bad. After a few more weeks, I began breaking some of it's delicate parts. It just wasn't sturdy (or my hand was just to heavy for delicate things).

Then came, the Ameda Egnell one-hand manual breastpump sent from the States by my in-laws. It was ergonomic and easy to use. I searched the net and discovered that the Ameda pump was even hospital grade just like Medela and Avent breastpumps. However, my hand would eventually stiffen after using it for 10-15min which would make me pump more heavier. It just wasn't the ideal breastpump for my busy working mom lifestyle.

Last thursday, I ended up stressed out and exhausted from trying to beat the clock all through the night while expressing milk for Polo. Only to find out that I was 1 bottle or 4oz short for my supply for the day, I was fretting during the day. All that worry caused me chills, a terrible headache, body pain and frequent and unpleasant trips to the comfort room. I ended up weak and nauseated the whole weekend!

I had to properly handle the pressure and stress of making sure Polo has sufficient milk supply for a day but I knew that I needed help. Only a more efficient and reliable breastpump could do the trick.

Thanks to my ever understanding and caring husband, I'm now a happy owner of a Medela mini-electric single breastpump! It's one gadget breastfeeding working moms should have :)

Months & Milestones

2007-05-31T18:30:00.000-07:00

It used to be weeks that I counted when it came to Polo's development that was because he was still in my womb. Now, I measure his growth in terms of the months and milestones...

He has learned how to feed on his fists and fingers. No wonder he's a good boy! He uses his fists to satisfy his hunger. Hehehe...

He stays awake for at least 30-45 minutes now. We have more time to play! We're playing "Pong Pong Kasile" here.

Goodbye fetal position. He's now more comfortable sleeping on his back. He still likes to cuddle especially when he wants to fall asleep. Cuddling him is my favorite past-time.

The frequency of his poop and pee has decreased a bit. Yey! That means we'll have savings from our diaper budget. Hehehe...

We can now hear his laugh. It now comes with a sound! He kept laughing last thursday when I repeated the words of Heidi Klum in the final episode of Project Runway, "Who, will be the winner of project runway..." I got him laughing even by just saying "Who, who, who" over and over again. :)

Prayer of Faith

2007-05-31T18:16:00.000-07:00

"Jesus said to them in reply, “Have faith in God.Amen, I say to you, whoever says to this mountain,‘Be lifted up and thrown into the sea,’and does not doubt in his heartbut believes that what he says will happen,it shall be done for him.Therefore I tell you, all that you ask for in prayer,believe that you will receive it and it shall be yours."

Amen. I say to myself and to everyone that I will breastfeed Polo until he is at least 1 year old. I will not doubt in my heart but believe that what I say shall happen and be done by God for me.

Lord, I ask that you continue to provide sufficient breastmilk for Polo. I believe and know that it shall happen as I request. In Jesus' name. Amen.

Indeed, nursing has become a walk of faith for me. A week or so ago, I had back up stock of expressed milk in the freezer that was good enough for an extra day. But now, Polo has increased his consumption. Whatever I pump and save today will be the amount of milk he'll consume the next day. No more back up stock.

Breastfeeding has now become daily bread, literally.

I know that I'll have enough supply if I diligently express milk during the day. Often times, what hinders me from doing this are the numerous meetings I have to attend to during the day. But, I've decided not to worry. God will make a way. He has provided me 24 hrs a day. I just need to find time and make time and so I will.

How Nice...

2007-05-25T03:49:00.000-07:00

Guys, look at this. It's something Marvin made to cheer me up today. Ah... bonding moments with Polo...

Special Treatment

2007-05-16T19:15:00.000-07:00

That's me with Polo comfortably breastfeeding in the breastfeeding station of SM Bicutan. I'm so grateful that Henry Sy and his people decided to create breastfeeding stations in SM Malls. So far, SM Megamall, SM Mall of Asia and SM Bicutan are their branches that have one.

The room had a blue love seat, a diaper changer table, a trash can, a sink and a flower vase with artificial flowers for effect. Simple but cozy and quiet. Exactly what a breastfeeding station should be. Oh and yeah, it also had a clinic located beside it. Talk about customer service.

Polo and I had our breastfeeding moment in peace.

Wish all malls and work places had designated breastfeeding stations.

Success!

2007-05-11T08:52:00.000-07:00

That's how I'd recall my first time to be away from Polo. Marvin and I attend our friends' wedding. We left Polo in the care of his dutiful grandmother for 8-10 hours.

Thank God, we all managed! My Mom and Jaz were able to take care of Polo and was able to do so with flying colors. According to them, Polo was like an angel. They didn't have any difficulty feeding him, changing his diapers or putting him to sleep. Whew! What a relief! This, for me, is an indication of how it will be when I go back to work on tuesday.

As for me, I managed not to shed a tear. Honestly, I was actually excited about the fact that I'll have alone time with my husband Marvin. Haven't had much of that since Polo's birth. And that I'll reunite with our friend from the BLD Community. In short, day off ko. Hehehe...

Good thing, I didn't turn into an anxious wreck! I think I was even cool about the whole thing. Probably, it was what my Mom said before I left the house that put me at ease. She actually asked us not to bother calling or checking on Polo. It was more like the typical "Don't call me, I'll call you" phrase. To me, that signified that they knew what to do and they did, indeed.

During the wedding, Marvin and I would think of Polo when we'd see parents carrying their children or running after them at the wedding. "Soon, we'll be like them, " is what I kept saying to myself.

We didn't get to stay till the end of the reception. We had to head back home to switch places with my Mom as it was her turn to leave the house and go to a wake.

When we got home, Marvin and I were delighted to see Polo. I was relieved, as well, that my first day away from Polo was finally over. I survived it! My Mom survived it! And so did Polo!

Wohoo! Thank you, Lord!

Accomplished!

2007-05-09T13:51:00.000-07:00

After 5 hours and 4 blog entries, I can now retire for the day. Or should I say for a moment? Polo will be awake in less than an hour to breastfeed... :)
I've been longing to create a new blog and update it with my life's recent developments.
Thank God, I got a head start in doing so. I hope I my eyebags won't betray me in the wedding this afternoon. :P

Dear Mommy

2007-05-09T13:24:00.000-07:00

Yes, it's true, a daughter appreciates and begins to understand her mother when she becomes a mother herself. With Polo now in my life, I'm getting a glimpse of what you're going through as a Mom.

I thank you for being my Mom, for doing the best you can all the time. For smiling and continuing to love and care for us even when we don't seem to appreciate all your efforts. Thank you for loving me enough to be there when I need you the most especially during the times that I feel that I could manage all by myself. Thank you for giving me space to grow and discover motherhood on my own and yet still be within an arm's reach when I don't have a clue.

Thanks for all the meals you heartily prepare daily. Thank you for all the prayers you offer on our behalf. Thank you for all the lessons and values you wish to instill in us. Thank you for recording all the important details of our life in your slumbook of life.

I love you for all that you are and all the you will be. I pray that God will continue to bestow you with inner and physical strength, wisdom and abundant love.

Mwah!

Separation Anxiety?

2007-05-09T12:39:00.000-07:00

In a couple of hours, Marvin and I will leave Polo in the care of my Mom. We're attending the wedding of our friends Mariel and Ponch at 2:30pm today. Unfortunately, the invitation is good for only 2 people. Polo's not invited. Well, it is a formal adult affair, anyway.

This will be the first time, I'll leave Polo and entrust someone else to take care of him. Since, I'll go back to work on May 15, today will be a trial. We'll see if the breastmilk I've been expressing and storing for him is enough.

More than keeping my fingers crossed on that one, I'm trusting that like Manna from Heaven, my breastmilk supply will be sufficient for Polo's daily needs. Just as Marvin told me, I should take it one day at a time. No need to fret but simply have faith that Polo will get his daily bread. Amen!

Part of me is anxious about leaving Polo with my Mom. I'm scared that she might finish up all the 63 oz of breastmilk I stored in our freezer just to keep Polo from crying (thinking that he's still hungry every time he cries). My Mom always seems to think that the milk Polo is taking in is not enough. That's why I'm afraid that she might have him gulp down more than the amount of milk I thawed for him today.

I'm also concerned about Polo. He might have separation anxiety as well and cry himself so badly. With that, my Mom might leave him to cry by himself to the point of exhaustion just to get him to quiet down and finally fall asleep.

Yep, I can be a worry-head. *Inhale*Exhale* Ok, I have to constantly remind myself that my Mom is a Pro. Heck, she already raised 3 daughters and successfully takes care of 2 grandchildren. She'll know what to do.

I wonder if I'll know what to do on my first day away from Polo. Yikes!

Taking It Slow

2007-05-09T10:23:00.000-07:00

Welcome to my new blog!

Something unfortunate happened to my old one that I no longer have the zeal to continue posting entries there. Well, it must have been something I did when I accessed over the 3G network using my celfone.

Anyway, I've been out of circulation in the blogging world for more than 2 months now and there's a lot of things to say! I don't even know where to begin.

First I was pregnant, had a surprise baby shower, surprised a couple of friends who planned a surprise baby shower for me, suprised my officemates by going straight to the delivery room on the day they planned yet another surprise baby shower for me. Why does everything have to be a surprise, anyway?

that's me at 6 mos

Then on Feb 21, 2007 at around 4:30pm, I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. Juan Paolo Andre is his name and he shall be called Polo (as requested by his Dad). :)

This is our 1st family picture.

Polo is just 2 weeks old here

Now, I have a lot to say about motherhood, having a baby and going back to work... Tralala... I find it to tiring to relay everything chronologically so I'll just take it slow and write about stuff randomly.

A World of Our Own

2006-09-24T22:44:00.000-07:00

Hey, look at us.

It's been almost two years now.

A couple of years back, we were dreaming,

Chasing the clouds, guessing what life will make out of us,

Wishing that come rain, come shine, we'll be happy, forever young and laughing.